The Fortress of Solitude
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in the "Raszama" journal:[<< Previous 20 entries]
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02:12 am
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gah
sigh
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04:18 pm
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Now playing at your local movie theater..
(from Yahoo.com's fantastic box office ticker)
Fantastic Four Knocked Up Nancy Drew
Horrible images from my childhood colliding! Doctor Doom, we need you to do a 23rd term nanoabortion!
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07:59 pm
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My dad used to beat me with his Beltway... Maybe that's why it's broken...
I'm going to go on the record here and say something about Washington, DC after living here for about 6 months:
There is no greater reason for why the decisions should not be made here than the Capital Beltway.
Possible reasons why so many "educated" (apparently the District has the workforce with the highest percentage of people with college degrees than anywhere in the US*) people can be so wrong:
1. A different road surface. I really think that the pavement must be made of a high-friction polymer that instantly causes anyone coming onto I-495 to lose 50% of their momentum. Friction also explains the unnatural heat and the number of broken down cars on the side of the road (every trip you will see about 5 abandoned vehicles).
2. The Department of Homeland Security Advanced Research Projects Agency (HSARPA) is actually projecting a dampening field around the Washington, DC area to cut the velocity of anything at least in half.
3. The terrible drinking water has lowered the collective IQ by about 40 points. That's why I use a Brita filter, boil my water, add iodine, de-ionize and irradiate it to make sure that it is acceptable to wash the floor with.
4. The bureaucracy extends even onto the highway.
5. It's a state vs. federal rights thing. When the damn thing was built during the Eisenhower administration, it probably went down like this:
Virgina: I want to build and maintain the roads, so my taxpayers will pay for it. Yay taxes!
Maryland: No, I want to do it! Yay taxes!
Delaware: Hey guys! I was the first state! Now I'm the least important one! Can I play?
District of Columbia: Yeah, yeah, you guys do it. I'll just take advantage of it. If I need to, though, I get to do whatever I want! I mean, if the executive, judicial, and legislative branches were arms on the 3-armed freak of the American form of government, I would be the appendix or some type of scabrous growth on its inner thigh.
Virginia: Shut the hell up, DC. You don't even have a vote in Congress.
Maryland: Yeah, bitch. Why don't you go whine in the corner or something, and let the adults talk.
DC: (runs off crying)
Virgina: Well, I guess that means you've gotta deal with it. I gotta go try to ban abortion again. (leaves)
Maryland: Well, shit, I don't have time for this. I think another 30,000 people just died in Baltimore in the last hour.(leaves)
Delaware: I'll help you out, man! I love being involved!
Beltway: hello? hello? Anyone?
Delaware: Hey! I'm here!
Beltway: Won't anyone help me?
Delaware: I will!
Beltway: Why won't anyone answer me?!?!?
6. The ghost of Jimmy Hoffa. It has to be the unions. Why else would there be construction that shuts down during rush hour to do seemingly nothing. I don't understand.
7. Pork and vendettas. When the thing was built, you know there was a senator that did something like this: "Hmm, I see that this is going to run through Senator Mitchell's neighborhood. That son-of-a-bitch didn't vote for my provision banning single-horned jackalopes from abandoned mines designated for demolition in my home state of Wyoming, so I'm going to get him back! Here comes the clause to make the beltway a 1/2 lane interchange right next to his house. We'll see if he can even make it to the next roll call! Ha!"
Or perhaps, like Anna Nicole Smith's tragic death, there really is no explanation for why the Capital Beltway is the worst highway in the world. I can only say that it is proof that the decisions should not be made here.
*Technically, the beltway isn't in the District, but I assert that enough people working therein that drive on it. So there.
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03:17 pm
[Link] | Samhain
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03:53 am
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Interesting statistic(s)
I just read an article about greenhouse emissions and energy usage, and did some more research and found an interesting stat about gasoline usage (measured in gallons) and energy usage (measure in kilowatt hours) per capita (measured in people).
Just out of curiosity, what state would everyone think has the highest fuel consumption and which do you think has the highest energy consumption?
By the way, the nat'l average is 464 gallons and 11,997 kWh per capita.
no cheating. You the livejournal community have 16 hours (2/3 of a day), i.e. until 10pm Friday to submit answers. if you guess right (or for some reason knew the right answer) I'll mail you something cool. This is the extent to which I am so entirely bored before my job starts.
go.
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09:02 pm
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Derrygodo
When I talked to him on the phone the other day, I assured him that both ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) littleredfrog and I would be able to entertain him because we were jobless. Now we're both gainfully employed.
So,
1. go us!
2. huzzah derrygodo and his Washington visitng. Others should see our place, I'll specifically call out mattyofg, retiredhegemon, and museofgoodcheer, plus other Dartmouth folk.
3. DITV tomorrow, perhaps?
I ordered some Deadlands books, and I hope to be playing that soon. Time is running out for gaming with lordof42.
Eh, that's all. Use Fi-Uh too.
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08:25 pm
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The Christian Way
From a recent videogaming experience, I have been re-educated about the Way of Christianity. Please read:
So, the other night, at around 4am, I couldn't sleep and resolved to exhaust myself with some intense Halo 2 action on Xbox live, playing under the callsign of my esteemed roommate cheapsniper, now added to the list of my esteemed roommates (ricekeispiesc, ibentmywookie, and the Chrono-Trigger-addicted magus145). Anyhow, cheapsniper is sometimes referred to as "ShortBus" and therefore he goes by the online persona of ShortBusAO. This is the background information.
Well, it's been an hour and I'm getting ready to turn it in for the night but I decide to play one last game of ranked Slayer (a 4v4 team format with a ladder system). I've improved ShortBusAO's ranking some in the past few weeks, so we're no longer playing with 8 year-olds, but instead marines who are taking time off from shooting Iraqis instead to shoot me. We play a small map, and almost immediately 2 of our 4 opponents quit. Bummer, another wasted 12 minutes. I decide to stick it out, not sure what quitting a game does for the ranking. Of the two players on the opposing side, one was simply awful, and the other neglected to fire a shot for the first 5 minutes of the game, instead just jumping around. I killed him a few times, but then got curious why he wasn't doing anything. So, when I encountered him, cornered in some room, he began to speak to me.
Callsign: MonkeyBarrel311: "Don't shoot!"
I, at this point, am perplexed (and we're winning by a ton, so I don't particularly care), and deicde that I won't just kill him.
MonkeyBarrel311: "Peace... Peace!... Peace!"
Now, cheapsniper has no voice support, so I can't respond. So i just sit there while he ejaculates "Peace" about 15 times.
MonkeyBarrel311: "Peace... Thank you. I am part of a Christian organization that is trying to stop the bloodshed and bring peace to Halo."
What?!
He continues, MonkeyBarrel311: "We are a growing organization of players that wants to bring peace to Halo. Are you at all interested?"
I think, "No, crazy person, for the first time ever, I have been frightened by a video game."
So, I turn and run away. He follows. I run around corners, I jump over objects, I run through teleporters. He follows, chanting "ShortBus..... ShortBus.... Hey, ShortBus," kind of like a serial killer. I use every trick in the level to lose him, but he only seems to gain on me. I finally go through a teleporter and am transported to the top of the stage, where my teammates are waiting. Ah, they'll save me.
They don't. They pause as well, just looking over this strange highly-ranked Halo player. He looks at me and says "ShortBus, do you want to bring peace to Halo? Are you at all interested?"
I, unable to return a response due to my lack of voice, do the only thing I can think of: I make my character turn left and right.
Immediately, I am showered with bullets and globules of plasma, as MonkeyBarrel311 rains fiery retribution down on my head. Fortunately, my teammates had itchy trigger-fingers, and kill him instantly, saving my now-condemned soul.
Then the game ended and it was over. The other night I met a Halo missionary, and he tried to kill me.
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06:55 pm
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For those..
who like horror movies and like not spending money, don't see Pulse. It's like 90 minutes of someone using a staple gun on your head. whoo!
Bring on Snakes on a Plane.
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12:24 am
[Link] | I came all the way to Wisconsin, and I didn't even see Lambeau field.
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09:45 am
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A game of questions
So, if you want me to interview you, there's some kind of procedure about it. Read the lj of every person on my friends page and you'll figure it out.
From the twisted mind of ibid32:
1) Which would you rather battle to the death: Chuck Norris or Keifer Sutherland?
( Read more... )
2) What's your favorite organized sport to play with friends?
( Read more... )
3) When you were little and wanted to be alone and safe, where did you go?
( Read more... )
4) Give the names of the five songs playing on repeat in your own personal hell.
( Read more... )
5) You have to form a cover band using members of alpha theta - what band do you cover, who's in the band, what do they play what's it called, who's you're manager, and what's your signature song?
( Read more... )
From the somewhat more twisted mind of copyrightkary:
1. Pretend life is one giant game of mafia that includes you and all other people in your town and you are the guardian angel, do you choose to save yourself each night or do you try to save someone else?( Read more... )
2. If you had to give up one ability (reading, swimming, walking (artsy things don’t count like playing the piano or sculpting) etc etc.) which would you give up and why?
( Read more... )
3. If you could do one, which would you do, Murder someone you hate/ detest/ despise/ whatever or successfully frame him for murder?
( Read more... )
4. If you had to pick one action in your life that you most regret and you’re willing to admit it on lj then what is it? Alternatively, what is the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done?
( Read more... )
5. What would you chose to eat if you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life?
( Read more... )
So yeah, leave me comments if you want me to come up with questions for ye..
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09:27 pm
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Deliver me from...
...drama. Thank god I'm graduating.
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02:30 pm
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I wonder
if I could use this as a section of my Classics CE:
"Tales of Brave Ulysses" by Cream
You thought the leaden winter would bring you down forever,
But you rode upon a steamer to the violence of the sun.
And the colors of the sea blind your eyes with trembling mermaids,
And you touch the distant beaches with tales of brave Ulysses:
How his naked ears were tortured by the sirens sweetly singing,
For the sparkling waves are calling you to kiss their white laced lips.
And you see a girl's brown body dancing through the turquoise,
And her footprints make you follow where the sky loves the sea.
And when your fingers find her, she drowns you in her body,
Carving deep blue ripples in the tissues of your mind.
The tiny purple fishes run laughing through your fingers,
And you want to take her with you to the hard land of the winter.
Her name is Aphrodite and she rides a crimson shell,
And you know you cannot leave her for you touched the distant sands
With tales of brave Ulysses; how his naked ears were tortured
By the sirens sweetly singing.
The tiny purple fishes run lauging through your fingers,
And you want to take her with you to the hard land of the winter.
I doubt it.
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05:07 am
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also
what's the likelihood that AO gets these guys: http://www.80sgold.net/
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04:45 am
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baargh
"Every little thing the reflex does
Leaves you answered with a question mark"
-Duran Duran
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03:55 pm
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Some thoughts on child bearing.
doogly showed me this long ago... I just thought I'd let you all know.
The raszama school of parenting:
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11:58 pm
[Link] | nequiquam
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05:50 pm
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A little Darwinian ire, perhaps, followed by some chilled finch.
( Read more... )
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03:36 pm
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Domo arigato...
( Read more... )
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01:29 pm
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Bite me, Daniel Defoe
pirates. oh man.
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01:55 pm
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Yesterday
This scene unfolded:
Me: Is it wrong to chew a piece of gum in the shower?
magus145:You know, I have to say, that is a thought that never crossed my mind. Just never. I've thought about a lot of things, but never have I wondered about chewing gum in the shower.
derrygodo: Yeah, me neither. It's exactly like law school.
Me: Yeah, but is it wrong?
JoeW: No, I regularly take a hard candy with me into the shower.
Me: So, it's ok?
All: Yeah.
Me: But what if I wish to continue chewing it afterward?
All: No.. no you can't do that!
I think the rest of the convrsation was ratbushed, so I'll hold my tongue. But yeah, I did take that gum into the shower. And I chewed it. And I kept chewing after the shower was over. Contrary to derrygodo's belief, I did not get shampoo in my mouth.
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